Fuck Brokencyde. Fuck You.

Really, I can’t think of a much cleverer title than that.  Or apt, for that matter.

Seriously Fuck Brokencyde.

Fuck them in their stupid auto-tuned faces.  Fuck their stupid swoop haircuts.  Their screamo-crunk musings.  Fuck their tight jeans.

But most of all, fuck their fans.

Yes, fuck you.

You caused them to happen.  You caused them to exist.  You allowed them to self-perpetuate, germinate and eventually reproduce.

And like the deformed baby brought about by incest, each of their offspring were worse than the last.

Attack Attack.

Asking Alexandria.

These Kids Wear Crowns.

Abandon All Ships.

Etc.

Sorry for not linking, but I refuse to associate that trash with this High Quality Blog (tm)

Each of them feasting off the ass-droppings of the last.

Consume, defecate, consume.

All of them sucked into the cycle.

I see no difference between any of them.  They are all equally terrible.

They do not qualify as music.

But is it their fault?

You were there.  You could have stopped it, but you didn’t.

Instead, you went to the shows and bought the albums.

When you were 13, you got your first tattoo.  It said “Bree Bree”.

I fucking hate you.

The problem is not with the music industry.

The problem is you.

The industry exists to supply you with what you want.

If only you liked better music.

I remember a time when punk used to be about something.  It used to be about attitude.

Now it’s about eurotrance and breakdowns.

Let me just say that I don’t have necessarily have anything against either style of music.

Okay, well, actually both are shit.

Sticking shit with shit doesn’t create gold.  It creates a bigger mess of shit.

But I guess most people like shit.

Just look at Kenny G.

He has sold over 75 million albums.

Eldridge Rodriguez has sold somewhere around ten.

Before in this website, I told you that I shouldn’t have the right to control what you listen to.

I was wrong.

For every dollar given to these Alternative Press cover-boys,

(and fuck Alternative Press too, by the way)

someone should get kicked in the stomach.

If you are caught with one of their records, that’s one kick.

Wearing a t-shirt should get you two.  Plus having your face smashed against a brick wall.

Going to the shows should get you full-blown prison rape.

I would say we should castrate all of the guys going to see these bands

but the truth is that none of them have dicks.

They don’t even have vaginas.

To say they did would be an insult to the beauty that is the vagina.

No sir,

they have nothing.  Simply a mound to rub against girls with swoop haircuts

in the mosh pit.